and entering

but also fuck the gym

Should You Hit the Gym, or Hit Jim?

people on treadmills
It’s that time of year again, you lily-livered fuck. Summer is just around the corner, and your pasty ass is looking thin and sickly—it’s time to get your rear in gear for that chiseled beach bod you’ve always wanted. Your longtime crush Samantha who tends the bar at O'Farrel's is looking hot as ever, and the sight of your suntanned musculature during the Fourth of July bar crawl in two months will surely woo her into your loving embrace.