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That Guy from High School Loses First Career MMA Fight, Announces Retirement

Boston, MA - Jimmy “Wolfman” Crawford, better known as “that guy who wore a Tapout shirt every fucking day of high school,” officially announced his retirement from mixed martial arts last Saturday. The announcement came following a loss in his first career fight against fan favorite Donny “Knife-hands” O’Connor.

“There comes a time in every fighter’s life when you have to admit that you’ve given it all you’ve got and it’s time to call it quits,” said Crawford in an official press release, “It’s been a good run and I’ll always look back fondly on my time in this great sport.”