A joint study conducted by a team of researchers at Dunster Happy Hour and a Party in New Quincy Thrown by That Guy Who Talks a Lot in Section has found that approximately 6 out of every 5 males at Harvard are homosexual.

Lead researcher Rachel Garcia said that these results only confirm what many in the Harvard social community had already expected."We had noticed an unusually high incidence of homosexuality on campus," Garcia explained, "so we wanted to run a controlled experiment to calculate a more precise 'gay rate.'"

Last Saturday night, a scantily clad Garcia infiltrated the Dunster Happy Hour and approached randomly selected male students while her counterpart Judy Rayland -- wearing an identical outfit -- did the same at the New Quincy Party. The experimenters then measured the positive response rate from the male subjects.

"No matter how slutty I acted or how easy I made myself out to be, none of the subjects showed the least bit of interest in hooking up," Rayland said.

Even more fascinating, 96% of the males complimented Rayland and Garcia on their fuchsia tube dress, and 79% were able to correctly identify that their shoes were made by Jimmy Choo.  Furthermore, 100% of the subjects, at some point in the interaction, hugged Rayland or Garcia and exclaimed, "Honey, you are so adorable!"

Based on this data, the pair of researchers concluded that approximately 120% of Harvard males are gay. The statistical analysis included in the final report indicates that this high figure can be attributed both to a homogenously gay male population, and a general lack of sobriety on the researchers' part.

Garcia and Rayland believe that, given these results, there is room for additional experimentation together.