SatireV

Breaking

and entering

Harvard

Bloods, Crips to Begin E-Recruiting

This fall, Harvard will see a sub­stantial
change to its normal recruiting season, as a number of street gangs begin
recruiting new members directly out of the senior class.

Harvard Student Expands into Allston Girl

Following his recent breakup with Susan O'Neil '09 of Currier House, Harvard student Steve Mann has reportedly exhausted all possibilities for expansion on the Cambridge side of the Charles river. Mann has since commissioned a series of artists to detail plans for future expansion into Allston girls.

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