SatireV

Breaking

and entering

Mouse

All I Want Is a Nice Shrewish Boy

A mouse with a menorah and the Torah floating in the background.

By a mouse

My parents keep telling me that I need to find a nice shrewish boy, but trapping the right shrewish boy is way easier said than done.

My mom says that generations of women in this family have devoted ourselves to the taming of the shrew. I secretly dated a hamster once—I couldn’t keep my paws off of him—but my brother ratted me out to my dad.

If you send a mouse a birthday text...

If you send a mouse a birthday text, he’ll probably want to “catch up some time”.      

If you vaguely say “that would be nice” he’ll probably want specifics.