By Josh Davis

Here's the deal, straight men: You need to accept that, as an out gay man, I eat more than just Red Delicious apples. It's true that what I do in the privacy of my own kitchen is my business and nobody else’s. But I’m not afraid to admit that I enjoy a wide array of fruit if it might teach privileged, straight men that my identity is not something for them to determine.

It’s time to end the harmful stereotype that identifying as homosexual is equivalent to declaring that you will only eat Red Delicious apples. 

Hello? It’s 2018, in case you didn’t get the memo. A gay man eating any kind of fruit besides America’s most popular apple might have been taboo in your time, but nowadays, the world is more forward-thinking. I’ve eaten Fujis, Granny Smiths, Honeycrisps, and even goddamn Ginger Golds. Do you know who eats Ginger Golds? Cultured motherfuckers with extensive experience in tasting many different apple cultivars, that’s who. People like me, a proud gay man.

I am more than a stereotype. I’m tired of straight men seeing LGBTQ characters on TV and assuming that we’re all like that. Just because you see a red apple in an episode of the critically acclaimed reboot of Will and Grace does not mean that that’s the only apple I can eat! I don’t wake up every morning, don a feather boa, and perform an original choreography of Cher’s “Believe” while noshing on a Red Delicious. And on the occasional Tuesday that I do, I always have a Braeburn apple for lunch. 

It’s time that you wake up and realize that queer people in today’s society can lead completely normal lives! We can have families, can have steady jobs, and can consume whatever produce is available at our local farmer’s market regardless of the seedling from which the parent plant was cloned. Please, guys, just try to be a little less ignorant.

And don't get me started on Pattypan squash. I won't even look at another kind of gourd.