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"I Know Where to Go From Here": Modern Day Magellan Turns Off GPS As He Approaches Destination

Corolla Captain Josh Robertson navigates without the help of his GPS, though his ineptitude makes a mutiny likely.

MORRISTOWN, NJ – As he approached his final destination, accountant and Ferdinand Magellan for our times Josh Robertson confidently disabled his GPS. “I know where to go from here,” Robertson declared to the other passengers, including his wife Jennifer and two kids.

Steering a beige 2005 Toyota Corolla southbound down the New Jersey Turnpike, Robertson astutely detected the exit for route 287, a highway that he regularly traverses. Taking stock of his surroundings, Robertson unplugged his GPS. “Do you want to shut down?” read the GPS display. “Yes,” said Robertson aloud.

“Are you sure you know how to get home from here?” asked Jennifer. In an interview, Jennifer said that her husband has, on several occasions, gotten lost because he refused to use the GPS.

“Oh, I’m sure,” responded the intrepid Robertson as he threw on his turning signal, adjusted his seat, and guided his Corolla off the Turnpike and onto route 287 like Henry Hudson himself.

Sources indicate that, after he switched off his GPS, Robertson routinely referred to cardinal directions and landmarks in his effort to navigate home.

“We live like ten minutes off the Turnpike, and there’s a little indicator on the rearview mirror,” said Jennifer.

According to reports, Robertson and his crew pulled into the wrong driveway, but Robertson has yet to admit his navigational error.


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