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tide pods

I Swear, If One of You Brats Eats a Tide Pod, SO HELP ME

Paul J. Barreira, director of Harvard University Health Services
Dear Members of the Harvard Community,
 
The number one priority at Harvard University Health Services (HUHS) is the health and safety of all members of our community. Unfortunately, it has never seemed to be among your top priorities. It's my job to keep all of you whiny little mumps-ridden shitheads safe, and I swear, if one of you brats eats a Tide Pod, SO HELP ME –
 
(Cool it, Paul. Think happy thoughts.)