SatireV

Breaking

and entering

Clinton Unable to Stop Smiling During Benghazi Hearing

Clinton reportedly greeted several members of the committee with a hug and a slap on the bottom.

WASHINGTON, D.C. ­– Unable to suppress her excitement, a giddy Secretary Hillary Clinton sat before the Select Committee on Benghazi Thursday to give a testimony once again on the September 11, 2012 attacks, a day after Vice President Joe Biden announced that he would not seek the 2016 Democratic nomination for President. On Thursday morning, Clinton was dropped off at the site of the hearing by a party bus rented just the night before. It is unclear whether Clinton made it home that night. 

The Republican-led committee, whose formal purpose is to conduct a thorough investigation of the Benghazi attacks and look for any evidence that could end Hillary Clinton’s political career, operated the panel. Committee members frequently had difficulty maintaining the Secretary’s attention as she gazed off into the distance, humming “Hail to the Chief” and imitating the cheers of tens of thousands of citizens attending an inauguration.

"Secretary Clinton...? Secretary Clinton?! Can you hear me?!" shouted committee chairman Trey Gowdy (R-S.C.) at the day dreaming presidential candidate. Clinton reportedly only snapped out of the trance after being addressed as “Madame President.”

“Is this some kind of joke to you? Are you enjoying this?” Gowdy supposedly asked the former Secretary of State, who was grinning from ear to ear. Mustering all her strength, the Secretary managed to reduce her enormous grin to a modest smirk before answering “no,” and clearly suppressing laughter of the purest joy. 

In a carefully crafted response, the former Secretary of State reportedly popped open a bottle of celebratory champagne and proposed a toast to “good ol’ Joe.”

 

Image source: Ramona's Voices, http://2.bp.blogspot.com/-jVQsafQp2QU/UQFIy2wuqwI/AAAAAAAAB1Q/ZNOGJbkzR-...

© 2015
Category: