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Man has Never Felt Deeper Bond Than When Peeing Side-by-Side with Dog

Quality bonding time between a man and his best friend.

CAMBRIDGE, MA - Basking in a love more profound than he had previously thought possible, area man Dennis Gilmore has reportedly never been more content than when peeing next to his dog, Doug. Sources say that Doug can regularly be spotted urinating on various lawns and shrubbery with Gilmore doing the same by his side.

“Doug and I are so on the same wavelength,” Gilmore said. “We do everything together - including taking care of our basic needs.”

Doug’s favorite spots to relieve himself include the fire hydrant on the corner of Bellevue, the big oak by the Chokrabarty house, and the park at the end of the street. Gilmore himself prefers the bushes on Avondale and Mrs. Suissman’s perfectly manicured lawn, but is willing to compromise for the sake of solidarity.

“At first it was definitely weird,” said neighbor Kim Zhu, “but now I think it’s kind of sweet. Love is love I guess.”

Sources reported Zhu being significantly less enthusiastic upon finding two matching piles of excrement on her lawn yesterday afternoon.

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