SatireV

Breaking News

1.0mm Pencil Lead

Winter is About to Come Right Now

"Look, Summer takes forever to come, why is this different?" http://tinyurl.com/lsretzr

Although it’s been trying to hold back and build up its endurance, Winter reports that it feels like it’s about to come right now. “Uggh,” said Winter when reached for comment, as it blew against the chapped faces of the denizens of Harvard Square. “I usually don’t come this early, I swear.” 

 Many Cambridge have residents expressed dissatisfaction with Winter for coming early (as usual). “I just never feel like I’m ready for it, you know?” shared local teacher Monica LeBranch. “Don’t get me wrong, Winter is the longest season and I certainly appreciate that, but it just seems to come so quickly.”

 However, others seem to be prepared for it and a few are even excited. Says one resident who prefers to remain anonymous, “I just feel so tense waiting for it! It’s just such a release when Winter finally comes.” Walking down the street one sees expectant, upturned faces just waiting to feel the first traces of Winter melting into their faces. Others stand with their tongues extended, just waiting to catch and taste it.

 A small handful of residents couldn’t be bothered by Winter’s efforts either way and said that it didn’t excite them anymore. “Honestly, I just don’t physically respond to Winter anymore,” said Robert McCaskill, a retired post officer. “I just sort of grab a book or two, turn on my side and wait for Winter to finish.”

© 2013
Category: