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Driver’s License Still Has No Crimson Cash on Fourth Swipe

CAMBRIDGE, MA – Dazed Quincy House senior Matthew Bradley '18 expressed surprise and disappointment tonight as, for the fourth consecutive time, his driver's license failed to register any stored Crimson cash when swiped it in a vending machine.
 

Crimson Cash Exchange Rate Plummets

New York City, NY—Crimson Cash collapsed in value in early trading Monday, on the heels of the revelation that the Harvard Corporation does not have $250,000 in liquid assets. Crimson Cash fell 30% versus Brown Bear Bucks, 23% versus the Euro, and reached a 5-year-low of 0.61 to the Princeton Paw Print.