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Area Taste-Tester Somehow Knows Packaged Chip Needs More Thiamin Mononitrate

PLANO, TX—On Wednesday afternoon, at Frito-Lay’s national headquarters, area taste-tester Carl L. Webber somehow knew that the packaged chip before him needed more thiamin mononitrate.

Sources familiar with Webber’s process say that Webber swirled the chip around in a glass, then paused thoughtfully, then allowed the aromas to waft towards him, then paused thoughtfully, then scribbled down, “Could really use some thiamin mononitrate.”

“It had notes of folic acid and a secondary aroma of maltodextrin,” Webber said. “But boy did that chip need thiamin mononitrate.”