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5 Classrooms to Scream in That Are All Sever 204

You have a final exam on Wednesday, a 12-page research paper due Thursday, and a meeting with your thesis advisor on Friday. You definitely think that shrieking ferociously loudly into the void would help you deal with all your stress, but your roommate is always sleeping. Lucky for you, Harvard has a wide variety of empty classrooms that you can scream in!

1. Sever 204

You despised your philosophy section in Sever 204 freshman spring. No better way to get back at Eric—the balding 7th-year PhD candidate who told you that your work lacked originality of thought—than by releasing a stream of profanity on the conference table where you first realized that the noun “liminality” turned Eric on. Jump on the table and yell the F word until you somehow feel better about everything.

2. Sever 204

You know what makes you mad? How Sever 204’s chalkboards are permanently coated in chalk even though there's an eraser right there. You know what else makes you mad? How your parents let your little sister get her ears pierced at age 7 even though they made you wait until you were 14. You can cope with all of these problems by roaring until your vocal chords bleed in Sever 204. Bang your hand against the chalkboard and wait for your troubles to waft away.

3. Sever 204

Why the hell does Sever 204 have a manual projector collecting dust in the corner? This is not 2005, and this is not your 3rd-grade math class. And why the hell did your linkmate have lunch with your ex-boyfriend in Quincy today when you specifically told her that he was off-limits? Seriously, you can’t catch a break. The good news is that nobody will hear you making a racket if you lock yourself in Sever 204 and start clawing at the chipping white paint.

4. Sever 204

That “emergency exit” sign in Sever 204 makes no sense. Where could it possibly lead—Sever 202? Honestly, in the event of an emergency, isn’t there a twisted logic to just dying in Sever? Didn’t you deep down always think that’s how it would all end? Speaking of logic, you completely forgot that your math pset is due at noon tomorrow. And that’s when your cousin gets to town to spend the week with you. Crap. Now would be a fine time to start screeching.

5. Sever 204

You hate how early the sun sets in the Massachusetts wintertime. And you hate how, even when the sun is out, it still feels like nighttime in Sever 204 because those tiny windows are covered by a damn screen. Get out all your pent-up frustration about your seasonal affective disorder by emitting an ear-piecing squawk until a TF from Sever 206 pops her head in to scold you that her students are trying to dissect Descartes in peace.

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