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95 Theses Nailed to Religion Department Office Ahead of Deadline

Marty Lucas '17 nails his thesis to the department's office door.
CAMBRIDGE, MA – Ahead of the senior thesis deadline, Comparative Study of Religion concentrators nailed 95 theses to the office of the Committee on the Study of Religion.
"The reception desk would have worked just fine," said a flustered Director of Undergraduate Studies Courtney Bickel Lamberth as she dislodged several theses from the office's door. "I don't understand how there are so many. We only have a dozen seniors!"
According to reports, aggrieved Religion concentrators wanted to demonstrate their frustration with the department's hierarchical structure. "It's so bureaucratic, and there are too many requirements. The thesis process was taxing," said Lucy Martins '17. "We're thinking of starting a bunch of smaller departments that can each focus more narrowly on specific religions."
Some concentrators, however, were in a more celebratory mood.
"After all these months of research, it was a relief to finally submit my thesis," said Marty Lucas '17. "Now, if you'll excuse me, I'm going to indulge in a few drinks with my friends."

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