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Harvard Student Receives B-

Daniel Woods, asleep at his desk.

Though GPAs have shown a steady increase over the past ten years, students throughout Harvard University were thrown into shock over recent reports that Daniel Woods, a junior concentrating in Economics, received a B- in his econometrics class.

"I'm still just not sure what happened," Woods was quoted moments after the shocking announcement. "I knew I slept through most of the final, but I definitely showed up. I mean, when they asked us to turn in our scrap paper separately from our answer books, I was there." Harvard University has been known recently for its generous grading policy.

According to the Dean of Undergraduate Education, nearly half of the grades issued in 2009 were As or A-minuses. But all of this has been thrown into question over Wednesday's shocking discovery.

"I fail to understand the controversy surrounding my decision," econometrics Professor Adams said in a press release. "Woods consistently failed to turn in his weekly problem sets, and only wrote his name on the exam. I specifically mention in the instructions that both your name, and the name of your teaching fellow must be written on the exam in order to receive the usual A-minus."

Harvard University has announced that grief counselors will be available, and a memorial service in honor of Woods' GPA will be held in Memorial Chapel Sunday at 3.

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