It’s taken me a long time to feel like I could bring this up, but now that I’m your best friend I feel like we should be able to talk about this sort of thing. Your parents definitely like me more than you. I don't know why, but I think it probably has something to do with my superior table manners, or maybe the way I always inquire about their days. Something about their supportive and approving comments just brings out the best in me. 

I’m writing this as an open letter to make sure I totally clear the air. I think it’s important that everyone understands our relationship, and that no blame can be put on me for trying to hide what’s really going on here.

Speaking of blame, you shouldn’t put any on yourself either! This isn’t a result of your failings. It’s more a result of my trying to make a good impression and doing a really incredible job of it. I know you think that as your parents get to know me better they might see past my exterior appearance of perfection, but really I think they'll just find more perfection underneath.

Going forward, I know it might bother you when your mom bakes me cookies or your dad invites me to go fishing, but I promise that their attempts to bond with me aren’t motivated by a desire to replace you. I think they just genuinely prefer my company to yours, and want to form stronger connections with me.  

On the subject of my replacing you: don’t worry about it! I would never partake in child swap, because I wouldn’t want to give my parents the short end of the stick.

One thing you might increasingly notice, however, is your other friends, I mean our other friends, also prefer me to you. Don’t worry about this either though; as long as you’re friends with me, it shouldn’t affect your social life at all!

Photo Credit: Christopher Michel