ARMAGEDDON -- As Judgment Day has fallen upon Humanity, reports indicate that Gov 20 TF Aaron Granderson has received a B+/A- on his life.

 

"I don't really know how to interpret this," said Granderson. "Was I not good enough for an A-, and the Almighty One threw me a bone? Or was God just trying to take me down notch, because I was starting to get cocky? What does this mean?"

 

The judgment particularly perplexed Granderson because he had previously discussed the trajectory of his life with God last week at church. "I thought I was on the right track. I guess I messed up somewhere along the line. But I must have done something right. How much did I do wrong? This is so confusing!"

 

For their part, Granderson's Gov 20 students are thrilled. "Serves that motherfucker right," said Vanessa Hu '19. "Nobody knows what a slash grade means. I hope he rots in hell/heaven. How about them apples/oranges?"

 

God declined to comment, but released a statement via Canvas saying Granderson could submit his life for a re-grade.