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Flamboyant Man's Grandmother Still Thinks "Gay" Means "Happy"

Local homosexual Gerald Carson was sighted aborting yet another attempt to come out to his 86-year-old grandmother in her Adult Living Apartment Complex last Sunday.
"I always hoped my grandson would be a gay, gay man!" gleefully remarked Eugenia Carson, marking Gerald's third failed attempt to use the word as an explanation that he felt most fulfilled when engaged in romantic and sexual relationships with other males. "At long last, my dream has been realized!"
After launching into a diatribe against her other grandchildren for never visiting her and delivering her such joyful news, Eugenia held her youngest grandson tightly. "And you always smell so earthy, Gerry! Like one big flaming fag, the kind we burned at our cul-de-sac bonfires in the old days!" 
Separating their bodies, she wiped at his electric blue eyeliner. "Honey, I think you've got something on your eyelids! Ya gotta shower regularly, alright? No one likes a big, dirty gay person!" Gerald then reportedly decided to put away photos of him and his power-bottom/boyfriend, Greer, from their last date weekend at Six Flags.
At the time of reporting, Eugenia was last seen boasting about her "gay ol' gem of a grandboy" to Constance Jefferson over tapioca pudding at Bingo Night.
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