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Barron Trump, White House Butler Embark on First of Many Wacky Adventures

Yarmouth doesn't much like adventures, but he has taken a liking to the youngest Trump.

WASHINGTON – Barron Trump, son of President Donald Trump, and White House butler Reginald Yarmouth teamed up for an exciting adventure today.

“Master Barron, this is much too risky. When your father hears about this—” said Yarmouth before being cut off by the youngest Trump.

“Come on Reginald! Don’t you want to see what’s behind that secret door in the Lincoln bedroom? It will only take a couple seconds I swear!”

“Well alright, if you insist,” said Yarmouth as he carefully placed the serving tray he was holding onto the nearest table, unbuttoned his jacket, and smoothed back his hair. “Shall I be getting the door for you, Master Barron?”

“No. We’ll get the door—together,” said the boy with an endearing smile. The adventurous couple crossed the threshold, carefully closed the door behind them, and thus entered the long-lost Lincoln Library.

“My word!” exclaimed Yarmouth. “After all these years I can’t believe I missed it. This is quite a collection!” Spotting a first edition copy of David Copperfield, Yarmouth pulled the book off the shelf. A moment later, the duo heard a strange noise from above.

“What was that, Reginald?” asked a suddenly nervous Barron.

“Why I believe it’s…it’s…” stammered Yarmouth as he looked up and saw, barreling down upon them, an enormous bust of the fourteenth President of the United States, Franklin Pierce.

“It’s a trap! RUN!”

Yarmouth scooped up the Trump lad, bounded toward the secret door, and—in the nick of time—secured a safe exit. They heard a loud thud from behind the now-closed door.

“Wow, that was amazing!” screamed an out-of-breath Barron.

“I say, we’re lucky that bust didn’t pierce right through us!” quipped Yarmouth, and the two shared a laugh. “Come now Master Barron. Off to bed.”

“Aww, but I want to go on another adventure!” the child whined as Yarmouth escorted him back to his bedroom.

“My dear boy, don’t despair! This is but the first of many adventures to come!” Yarmouth assured Barron before tucking him into bed and wishing him a very pleasant good night.

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