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Bush Ends War on Drugs

Bush makes peace with drugs, gaining a crucial ally in the war on terror

VERSAILLES, France -- Not for the first time in history, a major conflict has come to its end in the great Hall of Mirrors at Versailles. Earlier this week, in a media feeding frenzy, George W. Bush sat down and signed an accord ending the long-time war between the United States and drugs. George Clinton signed on behalf of drugs.

When pressed for comment on why he no longer wanted to fight drug use, the President snorted—in derision— citing the fact that the ongoing conflict was sapping resources from other administration tasks. President Bush commented that many of the Apache helicopters which had been strafing militarized compounds held in the clutches of drugs could now be sent to an even more worthwhile task—killing Muslim citizens.

© 2007
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