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Upstart News Anchor Vies for Bill O'Reilly's Timeslot

NEW YORK, NY – Fox News executives were impressed Sunday by a young upstart news anchor who auditioned to replace Bill O'Reilly, the long-time host of The O'Reilly Factor who was recently fired for repeated accusations of sexual harassment.
 
The anchor, who auditioned under the name Phil O'Smiley, is looking to replace the most popular host in cable news. Fox News parent company boss Rupert Murdoch, who is reportedly worried that the network will be hard-pressed to find an equally charismatic host, personally asked O'Smiley to audition.
 

Fox News Confirms Majority Of Harvard Students Seem To Have Paid Attention In History Class

Cambridge, MA--- A recent Fox News "Campus Reform" interview of Harvard students confirmed earlier this week that a majority of Harvard students do seem to have paid attention in history class at some point over the course of their lives.

The interview, which sought to determine if Harvard students thought America or ISIS is a greater threat to world peace, revealed unusually nuanced perspectives from students at one of the nation's top colleges, which indicated high levels of international history study and comprehension.