and entering

Hard to Watch: This Sophomore Thinks Carnitas is Harvard-Themed Meat

He may not get it, but you gotta admit he has a killer smile

CAMBRIDGE, MA— This Thursday, the Crimson received reports that Harvard sophomore Henry Williamson ’22 is convinced that carnitas is a special Harvard version of meat.

According to onlookers, Williamson offered repeated guesses as to what exactly made the ‘carnitas’ Harvard-themed. “He first asked me if it was crimson colored. When I didn’t respond, he asked if it was ‘the meat of three lies’. I tried to go hide behind the grill but when he saw my hat poking out he screamed asking if the meat wasn’t actually found in 1636” said El Jefe’s owner John Schall.

Sources close to Williamson claim that he has become nearly intolerable to hang out with. “He keeps saying that he wishes they sold Margaritas ‘back home’ whenever we go out” said Williamson’s roommate. “He’s from New Jersey.”

When asked for comment on the incident, Williamson said: “I sometimes have to consciously switch out of Harvard lingo when I talk about meat with my friends back at home.”

Recent reports from Saloniki Greek Restaurant indicate that Williamson was last seen questioning employees if their pitas were “Harvard-themed urine."

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