and entering

Lowell Sophomore Excited for Graduation of Senior Whose Name He Can’t Remember

Image Credit:
"Hey Dude"

Cambridge, MA- As the semester comes to a close, the bitter Massachusetts winter subsides, and students are preoccupied with formals and last chance hook-ups, our Harvard community’s mind turns towards graduation day.

“I am so excited,” said Taylor Johannes ‘16. “That senior who always says hi to me is finally going to be out of here.”

After having been introduced by a blockmate over lunch, Johannes and the unknown senior had a somewhat prolonged conversation about Jane Austen and Emma Goldman. As is typical for such meetings, names were forgotten. But, unfortunately for Johannes, he started running into this kid like, literally everywhere.

“At first it was just causal head nods, and I figured next time we chatted I could ask for his name again,” began Johannes. “But that was months ago and now every time I see him I just have to give him a ‘hey man.’”

“We share a God-damned d-hall,” added Johannes.

Of course it is much too late for Johannes to ask for the senior’s name again, but Johannes anticipates that the tried and true method of biding his time will soon bring a meek resolution to his awkward introversion.

And though things are looking up for Johannes, prospects remain dim for his roommate, Mack Vanderbilt ‘16, who still isn’t greeted in passing by that kid who shared a tent with him on his FOP trip, even though he totally recognizes him.





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