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midlife crisis

America’s Funniest Home Videos Is Better Than Sex, And I Would Know, I’ve Had a Lot of Sex

Bob Saget

by Bob Saget

I don’t know about you, but there is objectively no greater pleasure in life than seeing a mediocrely taped home video of a teenage boy wiping out on his four-wheeler while his entire family idly watches. A baby goat continually head butting himself in the mirror?  Forget about it.  A cat drinking from a water glass? Better than sex.

One may wonder what makes me, Bob Saget, qualified to deem something better than sex.  But let me tell you — it’s because I’ve had a lot of it. Like a lot.  

I Think My Adult Scooter Is Having a Midlife Crisis. Please Help

adult scooter

By A Distraught Cabot Resident

It all began when I noticed its new pair of premium rubber Harley-Davidson tires and Guy Fieri flame decals, but now it’s actively redirecting me to Chameleon Tattoo & Body Piercing in the Garage. I might be crazy, but my I think my red Razor A6 is having a midlife crisis.