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Area Man’s Favorite Video Way Less Funny When Shown to Friends

The goddamned cat barely even touched the bat this time.

CAMBRIDGE, MA—Minutes after falling out of his chair in laughter at what he was certain was the funniest video he’d ever seen, local student Joe Bevitt ’19 was shocked to discover his friends found it way less funny than he did.


The clip, entitled “The Cat and the Bat,” features a gray British Shorthair with tousled fur and closed eyes spread out on a bed. Alongside the cat is a large, brown baseball bat. After gathering all of his friends in his room to watch the video together, Bevitt, bouncing from foot to foot, built up major excitement and anxiously told his friends to “just wait thirty more seconds” for his favorite video to get funny.


As the cat remained completely motionless on the bed, Bevitt let out a nervous chuckle at what he was sure was funny last time, but his friends showed no indication they found the video even remotely humorous. One friend later told reporters that at this point he wondered if the joke was on them.


Bevitt attempted to justify his tastes while shaking the laptop in frustration, shouting “They took the funniest part out at the end! I swear it used to be there!” though he reportedly fooled no one. While all of Bevitt’s friends forced themselves to “smile faintly” in sympathy with his efforts, one friend, speaking on the condition of anonymity, was particularly unimpressed, telling reporters, “I’ve never known Joe to be a very funny guy, but this was a real all-time low.”


At press time, Bevitt had found the next greatest video on the internet in his YouTube sidebar, “Man Slaps Friend with a Hammer.”

© 2017