and entering

Trump Introduces Glass Ceiling Reinforcement Project, Creates Thousands of Jobs for White Men

One glass ceiling in desperate need of repair after this election.

NEW YORK, NY--In his first concrete policy proposal, president-elect Donald Trump has outlined a plan to rebuild America’s crumbling infrastructure, starting with repairing and reinforcing the glass ceiling that bars women and minorities from advancing in their professions. Trump hopes this plan will create hundreds of thousands of jobs for white, Christian men across the United States.


“Crooked Hillary knowingly put 18 million cracks in our national glass ceiling back in 2008, and it hasn’t been repaired since! Bad stuff, really bad. America’s sexist institutions have been in quite poor shape, and it’s about time we fixed them up to pre-Hillary levels,” Mr. Trump announced to reporters in a prepared statement.


According to policy experts, the Glass Ceiling Reinforcement Project will be the largest government-sponsored construction project since the New Deal. White men employed in the Glass Ceiling Reinforcement Project will be paid a living wage for their efforts to perpetuate and normalize the sexist rhetoric of Mr. Trump's 2016 presidential campaign.


Muncie, IN white man Joseph Johnson was enthusiastic about the plan, saying, “Our community hasn’t been able to sexually harass a woman in the workplace without getting sued since the 1960s! Hopefully, when that glass ceiling finally gets repaired, I’ll have the freedom to denigrate the status of women again.”


Mr. Trump's economic advisers add that the GCRP will not increase the national debt, and will instead be funded by a 21% tax on earnings by women.

© 2016