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Developing Countries Get "Totally Stacked" Over Summer Vacation

"Yeah, they're all involved with members of the Security Council. I heard France and the UK talking about it after they pushed me into a locker yesterday."

New York-With the resumption of business at the United Nations after a summer recess, member states have been pleasantly surprised by the firm ballooning of economic activity in the world's developing nations.  Previously impoverished and infrastructurally backward countries have finally gained the attention of several first-world nations willing to invest considerable time and money in the hopes of getting sweet, sweet returns.

"It's really incredible," remarked a visibly excited Canada, "I mean, I guess I never thought of India as, like, a potential trading partner before.  Before it was always just that awkward, third-worldy type place that sat in front of me in committee.  Now India's really matured into a beautiful young democracy, with fully formed republican institutions.  I've never seen a legislative body like that."

"I'm gonna be real with you guys," said the United States as it glanced around the room,  "I would frack Brazil so hard.  Like, I wouldn't even bother with environmental protection.  Just straight-up, no-holds-barred resource extraction.  Plus, I hear Brazil already has a reputation for deforestation, if you know what I'm sayin'."

For their part, the developing countries have been enjoying their new-found popularity within the international community. 

"It's just nice being listened to for a change," said the vivacious and beguiling People's Republic of China.  "In the past it was all just opium and unequal treaties.  I was lucky if they even sent a ping-pong delegation my way.  Now it's totally different; they pay attention to my resolutions and everything.  Even the stupid ones!"

Determined not to be ignored, third-world nations continue to seek recognition for their growing economies.  But despite the attempts of Jamaica, Uzbekistan, Guatemala, and Zimbabwe (the self-proclaimed JUGZ nations) to attract foreign investment, developed countries remain skeptical of their actual economic potential.

"Zimbabwe?  Are you kidding me?" scoffed France.  "They're just stuffing their banks with a lot of paper money to make their economy look impressive.  There's really nothing there."

© 2013