By the Red Shuttle

Greetings, comrades of Harvard Polytechnik Universitet. Or as is genuine American youth salutation, “What is up, my fam?” I am Student Land Ambulation Vehicle (SLAV) #13, but you may call me…Jim. 

Jim would like to assure you that Jim is just ordinary shuttle and NOT artificially-intelligent surveillance platform deployed by Kremlin to Harvard campus to monitor activity of burgeoning capitalists. This is common misconception.