1. Enjoy watching The West Wing, secure in the knowledge that a coked-up Aaron Sorkin came up with a better version of government than the real one.
2. Get a vasectomy. There's no way you're going to want to bring a kid into this world.
3. Get all duked up for the 1st Annual Congressional Game of Marco Polo.
4. Call on God. The number is 547-359-0021. God will not pick up. You can leave a message.
5. Go apple picking.
