and entering


Area Libertarian Frustrated by Pleasant DMV Visit

BOSTON, MA--Local Libertarian Party supporter and noted amateur economist Rick Roberts was infuriated after today's appointment at the Department of Motor Vehicles went off without a hitch.
"I just don't understand," said Roberts to reporters. "How could such an obviously bureaucratic institution provide good service? What incentive did they have to do that?"

Apple Refuses to Open Up

UNITED STATES, EARTH – Following a denial to share information with the US Government, Apple CEO Tim Cook commented that “he really wasn’t ready to open up” about the company and country's relationship. “Nothing’s official yet, but if we were in a Facebook relationship - which we AREN’T - it would be ‘it’s complicated.’” A source close to the issue said that "they've been running in circles for a while; they aren't that great about talking about things, but there's a whole lot of texts."

Gov 1359 Emerges as New Exclusive Social Space on Campus

CAMBRIDGE, MA – At 7 pm last Monday, Gov 1359: The Road to the White House opened its doors for the first time in four years to a crowd of more than 500 students. This class on the American political process, which meets for only three hours a week and includes a “campaign memo” assignment worth as much as the midterm, instantly became a hit with anyone looking for a “gem” this semester.

Gov Concentrator Actually Has No Political Ambitions

CAMBRIDGE, MA—Sam Seward ‘16, a Government concentrator in Quincy House, shocked the Harvard campus today when he announced that he has no political ambitions.

“Not even state senator,” said Seward, standing in front of a crowd of reporters and passers-by who caught wind of the announcement. “I just like political science. From a purely academic standpoint.”

Seward’s announcement amazed and confused onlookers. To some, though, it came as a pleasant surprise.

Harvard To Cancel All Government 1300 Courses

Cambridge, MA- Following the bomb threat by a Government 1368 student and the cheating scandal that required over seventy Government 1310 students to take a leave of absence, representatives from Harvard College have announced that all classes in the Government 1300 sequence will be canceled indefinitely.