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Don't Send Your Child To The Justice League

By Jor-El Deresiewicz

In the second winter of the year of Xorna, I did a daylong stint on the Justice League admissions committee. We, that is, three admissions staff, a member of the Justice League, and me, the representative from Krypton—were going through submissions from eastern Pennsylvania. The applicants had been assigned a score from one to four, calculated from a string of figures and codes—SATs, GPA, class rank, quality of superhero name, special powers, and diversity. 

Point/Counterpoint: The Wall on DeWolfe Street

Let’s Talk About Hook Culture

I’m sure you’ve heard this conversation. You’re sitting in the dining hall, surrounded by your girlfriends, when inevitably someone starts complaining about their love life. There’s this guy, she’ll say, and everything seemed to be going pretty well. Except... I can’t get him to commit.  And he also has a pegleg.

It seems like these days, especially on Harvard campus, everyone has a pegleg.

Why is a Card-Carrying Homosexual Marxist from Arkansas with Pre-Existing Health Conditions Running Gus and Sam’s Campaign?

Let me tell you about some of my heroes and why they should work together. 

The Crimson, which published a recent article on UC Presidential and Vice-Presidential candidates Gus Mayopoulos and Sam Clark, is Harvard’s oldest student-run publication.  It was founded in 1873, you most likely know it from articles such as “Harvard-Allston Task Force Debates Community Benefits Priorities”, “Allston Residents Divided on Benefits Package”, “The Benefits Package Unpacked”.

Advice Column: Ask That Girl Who’s Whispering Behind You In Lecture

Q:   I can’t figure out how to tell my parents I don’t want to come home for Christmas.  I love my family, but  they drive me crazy when we’re all together!  What should I do?

Point-Counterpoint: Should I Wear a Jacket?

Point: According to your weather app it’s going to be kind of chilly.

Counterpoint: But it’s so sunny outside.

 Point: But that girl out there is wearing a sweater.

Counterpoint: But she’s also wearing shorts. Wait, what’s the point of wearing shorts and a sweater, doesn’t that just ensure at least one part of you is going to be miserably hot or cold?  

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Why I’m Not Accepting Candy Handouts: An Editorial By Cambridge Middle School Student Randy Mankiw

 

 We all hear it and, as much as we want to deny it, it’s an inevitable fact of life: “You have to grow up.”

And that’s why I’m encouraging my fellow middle school students not to accept candy handouts from the citizens of Cambridge this Halloween season.

Krokodil: Good Product at a Fair Price

At first, when I decided to review the new krokodil drug, I wasn’t expecting anything particularly special.  I had heard that it was merely a cheaper version of heroin, and, as a heroin fan myself, I found it hard to be appealed by the prospects of a backyard substitute. 

Up-and-Coming Writer Lacks Plot, Substance

Karl Marx’s recently published “Communist Manifesto” leaves much to be desired. The novella has made many readers, including this critic, disappointed. The story lacks imagery, plot, and good characterization.

After Reading The Crimson's Staff Editorial This Morning, I Have Decided to Resign

A Guest Editorial by Dean Evelynn Hammonds

In my eleven years at Harvard, I have often asked myself: What would The Crimson staff writers do? I looked to them for news, opinions, and even fashion tips, so when The Crimson told me it was time to quit, I knew I just had to trust them.

Since the truth came to light this Tuesday, I know that The Crimson has spent many long minutes reviewing the facts. What I did was wrong, and after reading I understand that. I should not have told anyone about the second email search.

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